Cumplirle al Pueblo es Cumplirle a Dios

Within a week I will complete one year of living in Nicaragua, and four new Jesuit Volunteers will arrive to begin their two years here. Life is quite hectic. Four of my six community mates will be returning home to the U.S. in mid December, Jenna and I will coordinate orientation activities for the new volunteers, and work will be filled with cultural celebrations and end-of-the-year evaluations. The past few months have had their ups and downs, and life here has continued to be challenging, stressful, and rewarding all at the same time.

Los Bancos de Confianza

Life in the microlending banks at the Project in El Recreo continues to be a wonderful experience. I am assuming more responsibilities and integrating myself into the bank team, and many of the women in the banks are very warm and welcoming to me. Often on house visits the women gift me fresco (juice) and helado (popsicles in a bag). Most of the women have a plethora of adorable grandchildren running around their houses, so while I miss my former students a lot the banks serve as a good opportunity for playing with kids! The emotional burden of working in the banks, however, is quite heavy. These women are exceptionally impoverished and always teeter on the brink of health and economic crises. Many of the men in their lives either abandoned them with many children to care for, or they are still around but spend all the money on booze and are abusive to the women and their children. Above all I am very grateful to be a male figure in the lives of these women that seeks to protect and empower them as opposed to violate and dehumanize them.

“Poder para el Pueblo”, “Todos Contra Ortega”

"Power to the people", "Everyone Against Ortega". These are the slogans of the two opposing parties in Managua’s recent mayoral elections, posted on billboards at least every 100 yards on Managua’s main roads. The election was between the Sandinistas (The leftist ruling party of President Ortega) and the PLC (the right-wing opposition). For weeks leading up to the elections streets were blocked off with demonstrations, mostly pro Sandinista. Many people who dislike President Ortega and his tendencies of consolidating power and slowly moving Nicaragua in the direction of a dictatorship reluctantly unified and supported the PLC opposition candidate. Pre-election propaganda was suffocating, and accusations of electoral fraud were made weeks before the election even happened. The Sandinistas control the Electoral Commission, the Supreme Court, and most election observers and ballot counters were Sandinista supporters, so a fraudulent Sandinista victory was suspected from the beginning.
It turned out that the Sandinista mayoral candidate (a former boxing champion with a middle-school education) defeated the PLC candidate (a Harvard-educated businessman) by a 52% to 46% margin. The result was heavily disputed as ballots were presumed to be miscounted and many were found in the trash. Sandinista supporters took to the streets to “defend the vote”, and PLC supporters took the streets to demand a recount. The situation quickly became depressing. Fights broke out between demonstrators and people were beaten and stabbed to death, police violently cracked down on protestors, journalists were assaulted, major intersections were blocked off, cars were set on fire, etc. Sandinista caravans were a common sight; 10 or 15 school busses packed with people waving their party flags out the window on their way to the major intersections where the demonstrations were held. The political demonstrations and violence continued for 2 weeks until a recount produced the same result. The Sandinistas then held a huge party in the streets and everything finally died down. Now the boxing champion and protégé of President Ortega is the next mayor of the capital, and a lot of Nicaraguans are deeply concerned about their country’s deteriorating democracy and propensity toward violence.

Barrio El Recreo

El Recreo has seen a disturbing rise in violence and despair, pretty much proportionally to that of the rest of Managua. Surprise police drug raids happen way too often within a one block radius of the Project, and gang violence is getting a little out of control. Last weekend was one of the worst in years according to my coworkers who live in the neighborhood. They said that you couldn’t sleep Friday or Saturday night because of the noise of machetes scraping pavement, yelling, and gunshots. Two youth were killed over the weekend from machete and gunshot wounds, and a number of others wounded. The father of one of my former students was hospitalized with machete wounds, and one of the boys killed was the next door neighbor of my coworker. The gangs in El Recreo are territorial, and when pandilleros from El Recreo Sur cross the road into El Recreo Norte, 20 year old boys machete each other to death. The nuns in El Recreo said that the saddest part of it all was that 10 years ago a lot of these gang members frequented the Project. The same kids that went to class together in the morning and sat next to each other during lunch at the Project are all of the sudden arch enemies because they live 3 blocks apart. Lucky for the three of us Jesuit Volunteers who work at the Project, the violence has mostly been on weekend nights between gang members, so we’ve been immune because we’re never in the wrong place at the wrong time. But the senselessness and brutality of young men with nothing to do but drink and harass people does concern me. As Dona Aura (the cook in the Comedor) put it, if good people in El Recreo back down because of fear, then violence and recklessness take over. What the Project offers, she says, is an alternative to that violence for the women and children of El Recreo. Hopefully the Project can teach kids the basic values of caring for one another and empower women to stand up against the violence in their homes.

JVI Staff in Town

Well, we Jesuit Volunteers had the pleasure recently of receiving our Program Coordinator, the Executive Director of JVI, and the President of the Jesuit Volunteer Corps here for a couple weeks. We had a 5 day end-of-the-year retreat with our Program Coordinator Kristen in which we stayed in a freezing, beautiful mountain village and reflected on our last year together. It was kind of a check in on cultural immersion, simple living, social justice, and community life. Megan and Kevin, the respective directors of JVI and JVC then came down to check out what we do here and spend some time in all of our work sites. It was wonderful to get some encouragement and support and share our lives and experiences here with the people who do all the office work and coordination necessary for us to do what we do here in Nicaragua.

Happy Thanksgiving, and thanks for reading!

Peace and Love,
Michael







Me with Kevin (President of JVC), Kristen (JVI Program Coordinator), and Megan (Exec. Director of JVI), in the Casa de la Mujer during their visit to the banks in El Recreo.


Me and Maria Hernandez during a weekly bank meeting with the women. Myself and the other women sitting down are "cobrando", collecting the weekly payments from the women and putting some of their money into savings.


One of our final exercises during our retreat was to prepare a sort of prayer/reflection for the four volunteers who will be returning to the states in a few weeks. We set up a little altar which we used to express hopes and fears for the major changes coming up.


Beautiful sunset and view of the countryide and volcanoes in the distance during our retreat.

Los cambios

I see change as an opportunity to break with the old way of doing things and discover something better. Currently my life is defined by change, and I am optimistic. For 10 months as a teacher and tutor at Proyecto Generando Vida in Barrio El Recreo I have struggled daily to be a quality educator and role model and to inspire and love my students. Considering the circumstances of your average classroom in this neighborhood, I think I’ve done a fairly good job. But the struggle has been overwhelming. Ten hour work days packed with stress and gut-wrenching emotions, with little spare time to process, reflect, and rest has caused me to run a physical and emotional deficit. This deficit eventually came to a head in the form of crisis (I’m in solidarity with the U.S. economy), and I missed the better part of a week of work due to various illnesses. As a result, my director and I decided that, for my own health, I ought to take a little time off from teaching. I decided to take it a step further and consider a career change within the Project.

As of now I am a sort of intern in the microlending banks at Proyecto Generando Vida. I view the microlending banks as a much less stressful option than teaching (I would deal with rational adult women), very meaningful (empowering women), and enjoyable (there is a lot of dealing with numbers and visiting women in their homes, both of which I love to do). For the next few weeks I will be working half time, learning about the banks while leaving time for much needed rest and reflection. If all goes well, my hope is to insert myself into the bank team full time in November and continue in that role for my final year in JVI.

There are roughly 170 women of El Recreo involved in the banks, and they are divided into groups of about 25. Each group of 25 or so is called a bank. So there are 7 ‘banks’. The women are obviously poor, and the loans are quite small. The idea is to give women loans that they can invest in a small business and make enough money to pay back the loan and make some extra income for basic needs and maybe even for savings. The small businesses are generally tortilla selling on the street and small ‘ventas’ that sell junk food and juice. The banks do not lift the women out of poverty or give them enough extra income to build a house, but the loans do help the women keep their small businesses afloat and provide them with enough income to keep their children clothed and fed. The banks are called “bancos de confianza”, or banks of trust. Solidarity is encouraged among the women. If one woman in a bank cannot pay back her loan, the burden lies on the rest of the women to help her pay it. The sense of friendship and community that is built among the women is pretty impressive.

I just completed my first week in the banks, and I love it. The women gave me an unexpectedly warm welcome, and I work closely with a team of 3 coworkers who are wise, loving, and funny. The job is diverse- in the same day I can be in a bank meeting with a group of women (giving them the loans or charging them their weekly payments), doing paperwork in the office, or walking all over El Recreo visiting women in their homes. I have a lot of hopes for my time in the banks. Empowering impoverished and often abused women with a sense of community and with money to invest in a small business is important work. I loved the workers on the bank team back when I was teaching, and I am thrilled to spend my days with them. As a teacher I very much worked alone, but in the banks I am constantly in conversation with the other team members, so friendships and Spanish proficiency ought to improve dramatically. I also love playing with numbers and money, and I feel more gifted at that than classroom management.

I very much believe that working for a more just and loving world ought to be a struggle, as there are powerful forces of greed, selfishness, and violence that need to be overcome. Yet the struggle that I have fought for the last 10 months in the classroom was a little too much of a struggle, to the point that it was unhealthy. I felt as if I was working against the grain, fighting off one obstacle after another just to hold my class together. I hope and believe that the struggle for justice on behalf of the women of El Recreo is one for which I am more naturally suited.

Aside from work, a lot of fun things have happened in the last few months here. Community life and excursions are also a big part of my life. Instead of writing about those things right now I will include some pictures, somewhat randomly, to help depict my life here in Nicaragua. Thanks for reading and for all the support (verbal, written, or moral support) you have given me!



My community, on a week long retreat at the beach.


This was my morning class in the comedor. I tried to catch them in a moment of diligent in-class work the best I could. While the class was so tough that it caused me unimaginable stress and exhaustion, I feel that in the last few months with these students my love for them grew remarkably, as did their respect and affection for me.


Every day I took the kids out to the ´cancha´ (a crumbling cement basketball court) to play soccer for 15 minutes, or for 1 hour on Fridays. This is Juan. He prefers his sandals on his hands.


Josh, James, and I posing as Nicaraguan males.


July 19 was revolution day...free Sandinista hats for everyone...I couldn´t resist.


Mariela Reyes and Myrna Lopez Rizo. Mariela teaches computer classes at the Project, Myrna is the coordinator of the Library. Mariela blows me away with her strength and the respect she earns and deserves. I would consider her the spark at Proyecto Generando Vida. She encourages, fires people up, loves unconditionally, organizes women in the community, and stands up for other people´s rights. Myrna is my closest friend at the Project.


Silvio Sanchez and Doña Aura. Silvio is the coordinator of the Banks (now my supervisor and coworker) and has been at the Project for 14 years. He is the only other male at the project besides me, and is a mentor in a sense. Doña Aura is the elderly, wise woman that everyone respects, even the kids. She has been around since day 1, and she cooks for 120 kids every day. She has a story about everything from child psychology to what life was like during the war 25 years ago.


James and I climbed Volcán Telica, a beautiful hike with a surreal crater and beautiful views of the countryside.


The volcano is very active and the steam unpleasant to inhale. Upon approaching the crater one could hear the steam shooting out of a vent deep in the crater. We threw rocks in the crater and timed the fall to see how deep and steap it was...very deep and steap.


Grety, a fighter of a woman and a member of the bank team, with Doña Aura.


Jeffry, my best student, and unrivaled soccer champion in my class. He dropped out of school after repeating 4th grade multiple times. His brilliance astounds me...he is more advanced than my 6th graders and can solve a Sudoku puzzle almost as quick as I can.


Mary and I rocking out at home.


July 19, the day that everyone celebrates the liberation of Nicaragua from a repressive dictatorship. Unfortunately, the celebration was somewhat hijacked by the ruling party who used it as a campaign rally. The colors black and red are meant to symbolize the revolutionary victory...the pink is the FSLN´s new color, and in a sense symbolic of revolutionary politics being replaced with corruption and power hoarding.


In the classroom doing some warm up activities with three gems: Jose Daniel, Junieth, and Valeria.



Fellow Jesuit Volunteers from Belize stopped in for a visit!


My youngest and cutest student, Darling, preferring the swing over soccer.

Palo Lucio!

July was a big month in Nicaragua. A two week vacation from work, the annual celebration of the triumph of the 1979 Sandinista revolution, and the Santo Domingo Patron Saint celebration right outside our house provide a plethora of exciting experiences worth sharing.
Sixteen days off from a stressful job is a wonderful thing, and a perfect opportunity to enjoy the beauty of Nicaragua outside of its capital city. On July 5, vacation was officially kicked off with a Proyecto Generando Vida all-staff field trip, or ‘paseo’ to the beach on the Pacific coast. It was a great opportunity to frolic in the waves with coworkers and play soccer in the sand with their kids. The staff at the Project in El Recreo are pretty close knit, and it’s really great to build friendships and a general sense of unity by all chilling together at the beach.

Chillin at the beach with Brayan (son of a coworker) and Julio (volunteer in the library).


Doña Elieth (the maker of my daily lunches), Rosario (Brayan´s mother), and Rosa (fellow teacher, highly respected by me for her difficult life and wonderfully dry sense of humor).

A few days after the El Recreo paseo I chose to embark on a solo adventure to a remote and unfamiliar corner of the country, which turned out to be so beautiful that I wish I had brought a friend and/or camera. I traveled to the northwestern-most point of Nicaragua, a peninsula that juts out into the Gulf of Fonseca , a tiny body of water bordered by Nicaragua, El Salvador, and Honduras. My goal was to climb the Cosiguina volcano in the center of the peninsula, a small remnant of what used to be Central America’s tallest volcano until it blew it’s top in the 1800s. After a 6 hour busride (the last three hours covering about 20 miles of flooded dirt road) I arrived in Potosi, a small fishing village with a stunning view across the bay to Nicaragua’s two neighbors. I spent the night at a hostel run by a very friendly family, former residents of Miami (Miami is the primary destination for Nicaraguan immigrants). With a map drawn on a napkin and extremely vague verbal directions from the husband at the hostel, I navigated dirt roads and cow paths to the top of Volcan Cosiguina. As I approached the crater I looked out over the Gulf of Fonseca to the volcanoes and mountains of El Salvador and Honduras, and south over Northwestern Nicaragua. I contemplated everything I had learned about civil wars and U.S. intervention in the 1980s, and how the Gulf of Fonseca was mined by the U.S. to prevent arms shipments from Nicaragua to El Salvador. Such a peaceful place with a violent past. When I reached the crater I almost had a heart attack…not only was the laguna at the bottom of the crater one of the most pristine bodies of water I have ever laid eyes upon, but the 900 foot drop from the peak of the crater to the water was pretty much sheer cliff. On my hands and knees I crawled to the edge of the crater and all I could see were the tops of trees a couple hundred feet down. Terrifying. The cliffs were half rock/ half jungle with eagles and butterflies everywhere. Without exaggeration, the power demonstrated by the steep cliffs and the beautiful jungle and laguna made Volcan Cosiguina, again, without exaggeration, the most beautiful thing I have ever seen. Should have brought a camera. Or a witness.


Aerial shot of Cosigüina, not taken by me, and not doing justice to the true beauty of the crater, but just to give you an idea.


Satellite foto of the Cosiüina peninsula, the volcano being the little blue dot.

After resting up for a few days in the casa, Mary (fellow Jesuit Volunteer and housemate) and I traveled north to the Reserva Natural de Tisey outside of Esteli for a few days in the mountains. On this adventure it really struck me how beautiful of a country this really is. We stayed at a little hut/hostel at about 5,000 feet elevation, surrounded by rolling hills covered in pine trees…mmm pine trees. It was a very peaceful time filled with hiking, being cold for once, stunning views, delicious cheese, a crazy old man carving brilliant sculptures into a mountainside, and a ton of Anthony De Mello spiritual brain teasers. I returned to Managua very rejuvenated, and was reminded of home by the serene and tranquil time spent in nature…cold, mountainous nature. To top off the vacation we had 2 former JVs from Belize passing through on their way back to the states, which was wonderful to compare and contrast experiences as Jesuit Volunteers in different countries.


The campo in Tisey.



Walking along old man Alberto´s moutainside of rock carvings.


Beautiful, freezing waterfall near Tisey.


Mary and me on our last day in the mountains.

On the second to last day of vacation came the time to commemorate the victory of the revolution…
“Hacia El Sol de la Victora!” – until the sunshine of the revolution, says Nicaragua’s president. 19 de Julio (July 19th) is the day in 1979 when Sandinista revolutionary forces (commanded by current President Ortega) defeated the repressive U.S. backed Somoza dictatorship and replaced it with a semi-socialist government bent on offering free health care, cheap food, and eradicating illiteracy. Many Nicaraguans no longer support the FSLN or Mr. Ortega, the leaders of the revolution, but the vast majority are in favor of the 1979 revolution and the social programs implemented in the first few years of the revolutionary government in the 1980s. Unfortunately, due to Ortega being the current president, the celebration of the revolution was very political party-oriented, celebrating the ruling FSLN party and not necessarily the revolution in general. The celebration was held in the outdoor central plaza and packed by a ridiculous amount of FSLN and revolution supporters, maybe in the hundreds of thousands, I’m not sure. The entire plaza was essentially a sea of red and black flags, the colors of the Sandinistas at the time of the revolution. The celebration consisted of sing-alongs and revolutionary chants and was “highlighted” by a number of speeches by politicians. President Ortega’s wife, Rosario Murillo (aka La Chamuca – Spanish for evil witch) did way too much talking and hailed her husband’s current politics rather than the heroes of the 1979 revolution. Side note- Ortega officially gave ½ of his executive powers over to his first lady, and many assume this is because he molested his stepdaughter a few years back and his wife agreed not to testify against him if he shared power with her if and when elected president. Pretty weird, and everyone thinks Rosario is a little crazy.
After Rosario bored the crowd to tears, speeches were delivered on the importance of maintaining the revolutionary zeal in Latin America by the Vice President of Cuba, the former Catholic bishop and recently elected President of Paraguay, the President of Honduras, and, dun dun nuh duh…special guest appearance by the revolutionary all-star and President of Venezuela, Hugo Chavez! Chavez was clearly the keynote speaker and highlight of the evening’s event. He introduced himself by dancing and singing “El Yanqui se va a joder”, or “the U.S. is going down!”. Then, after promising a concise speech, Chavez delivered a brilliant and ecstatic 45 minute rant against U.S. economic and military imperialism and the promise and hope of Latin American leftist unity. Although I thought it was a little inconsiderate that Chavez left about 4 minutes for Nicaragua’s president to speak at the end, and I was a little nervous when he continually riled up the crowd with anti-U.S. sentiment, I have to admit he was a hilarious and very charismatic speaker. It was admittedly very entertaining to listen to him, and there was a tangible sense that his presence was significant, being probably the most influential Latin American leader in the international arena and a leftist as well. I appreciated his message that Nicaragua, Venezuela, Bolivia, Cuba, Paraguay, Ecuador, and all impoverished or oppressed people in Latin America are united in their common struggles and goals. On the other hand, it was also quite clear that the only reasons this man has so much power and influence are essentially twofold: he’s a great personality and charismatic leader, and his country has oil. It was kind of funny when he would go off about injustices perpetrated by the U.S. in Latin America and his face would get all red and sweaty…he’s kind of a portly figure and it’s pretty comical to see him get so riled up. We, like most Nicaraguans at the event, left after Chavez was finished and as President Ortega began speaking, a sign that most Nicaraguans love the 1979 revolution but have no respect for the current President.
Back to work on the 21st, rejuvenated from some great times over vacation, I began work as a tutor in the afternoons instead of a teacher. A Nicaraguan woman was hired to take over my 4th grade class, and I now work with 2 or 3 of my students at a time in the afternoons throughout the week…most have not been bringing any homework, which makes it difficult to keep them occupied and on task in the library for 2.5 hours at a time. I appreciate the freedom to be a little more laid back and creative as I am no longer in the classroom in the afternoons but rather at a bench with 2 kids, and it’s much less stressful not having to yell or be yelled at all afternoon. I also feel like my chances of making progress with any students is much higher with 2 at a time. My morning class, on the flipside, just got a lot harder as one of the three teachers moved from the Comedor back to the library, leaving just two of us to split up the 30-40 students. Then we reorganized the classes by academic level instead of age (so we wouldn’t have two 12 year olds, one in 1st grade and one in 6th grade), all of the kids who can read, write, and add are with me, and the rest are with Profesora Arlen. With that switch, my average attendance went from about 7 to 19 overnight. So the dynamic is a little more intense, but my kids are more at an equal academic level, making teaching a little easier. Not having a class to plan in the afternoon, I’m free to focus more energies on the morning class, so it’s a good balance right now.
As my classroom situation has improved (as has my relationship with coworkers, spending more time together outside of work and actually enjoying forced time together in staff meetings and mini retreats), going to work everyday has still been stressful due to the devastating realities lived by kids in the El Recreo neighborhood. Dayra, a student who has touched my heart, made me all sorts of adorable drawings, and impressed my with her creativity, has always pulled at my heart with her intense shyness and insecurity. She has “I have problems at home” written all over her. But it’s always been clear that she’s just got something special about her, something that is smothered by her environment. Her mother has abandoned her and her siblings, and she lives with her ailing grandmother and abusive brothers. I learned this week that she was pulled out of school because she was failing most of her classes…this will be her third time failing 4th grade. I felt very incapable as a teacher…her teacher, not even realizing that she was so far behind and didn’t even know that she wasn’t going to school anymore. I still feel incapable of pulling her out of this situation…there are just so many forces pulling her down that I don’t know how to compete with. She’s coming to the library a lot to work on multiplication tables and she’s showing up to my class lately with a smile on her face, which are positive signs.
Another less personal thing that has caused a lot of stress at work is the recent murder of a 13 year old boy about one block from the Project. I did not know the boy, but apparently he used to come to the Project until about 2 years ago. He was buying a popsicle at a venta, and all of the sudden he was caught in the middle of opposing gang members throwing rocks at each other. One of the gang members fired two shots, and a stray bullet struck the boy and killed him. The man that killed him is a 37 year old drug dealer known by everyone, including the newspaper and undoubtedly the police. When I asked my coworkers if he’s been arrested, they sneered and said he had far too much money and power for the police to go anywhere near him. Talk of gang violence in El Recreo has never bothered me because I know that, for whatever reason, those gangs don’t target foreigners in the neighborhood. We were all put a little more on edge when it became evident that there are people in El Recreo who don’t have a problem with shooting a gun at random without fear of repercussions. That incident, along with Dayra’s situation, has been making life in El Recreo a little more tense lately.
The celebrations of Santo Domingo have been a good relief from the stresses of work in El Recreo lately. Santo Domingo is, I believe, the Patron Saint of Managua, and a miracle involving him is celebrated for nine days beginning on July 31st. The night of the 31st is when the real festivities happen. The best part is that we live 2 blocks from the Rotunda Santo Domingo, so the massive street party was right outside our house! There was tons of music, dancing, fried food, drunk men, pick pocketers, carnival stuff, and the legendary PALO LUCIO – roughly translated as ‘telephone pole with great prizes at the top, you just have to shimmy up the pole to get them…the only catch being that the pole is thickly coated with pig fat!’ So every year many men try to climb this pole, but naturally slide right down due to the thick brown grease. Josh and I thought we’d give it a shot, so we joined the many drunk men and street kids who were strategically trying to build a human pyramid and climb upon one another’s shoulders to the top. The Palo Lucio is kind of the main event of the night, with everyone watching the hilarious act of mostly drunk men attempting the nearly impossible feat of scaling a greased 30 foot pole. It was kind of a blur, but I’m pretty sure we got the crowd roaring when they saw two tall white guys scramble up on people’s shoulders and set the foundation for a pretty good run up the Palo. The guys below us were screaming and cheering us on with slogans such as “Come on, whitey!” and “[expletive deleted] climb!” Shimmying up a pole while supporting the weight of multiple people on your shoulders and arms is pretty hard, but once everything and everyone is coated in pig fat it’s pretty much hopeless. With 3 or 4 people above me and Josh, everyone started to collapse under the weight and we all slowly slid down the pole and crumpled into a greasy pile on the ground. It was physically exhausting and disgusting, but quite a treat to participate in such an important tradition. I had multiple students and coworkers last week jokingly ask if I would be climbing the pig-fat pole, so it will be an honor to go back to work and say that indeed I did attempt the impossible.


I´m in white, Josh is slightly above me in blue.


The Palo in it´s full glory...oops, I think we´re starting to slide...


On the way down.


Done, exhausted, sore, and greasy. Josh and I were begged to give it a few more tries, but we just had to turn down the offers.


Right before heading to the Palo Lucio, we stopped in on our next door neighbor´s 5 year old birthday party. Hassen is the source of many smiles and laughs in our house. He is notorious for being funny while angry and falling off his bike right in front of our door.


Three of El Recreo´s cuter kids...Abigail on the right just might be my favorite child in the whole neighborhood!

It's rainy season!

Community at the beach during an El Recreo outing. Jenna is taking the picture.


It’s now been nearly 7 months since I arrived in Managua last December, which means I’m one quarter of the way done with my time here, and over half way done with my current house community. Emotions are mixed. On the one hand, this (working in Barrio El Recreo and living in intentional community in Managua) is the most challenging thing I’ve ever done, and part of me will breathe a sigh of relief when I get through it. I also eagerly look forward to the arrival of 4 new Jesuit Volunteers with whom I will spend 1 year of my life come this December. So from that perspective, I’m happy that time is flying by. On the other hand, I have an inexplicable love for everything about life here, including work in El Recreo. My everyday life feels very meaningful, and I am thankful for that. I also love my current community and will be very sad when 4 of them are replaced in December. So that makes me anxious that time is flying by so quickly. Anyway, there are three topics that I would love to touch on in this entry; an update on the current political and economic situation in Nicaragua, work at Projecto Generando Vida, and a recent retreat to the beach! Feel free to skip around, as the sections have headings. Also, there are some random pictures at the end.

Nicaragua’s current political and economic situation: Jodido. That’s Nicaraguan for ‘in big, big trouble’. On the political front, the former revolutionary leader and current president is quite frankly running this country into the ground (not that any of his competitors would have done differently). Roads are still being paved in the poorest neighborhoods, but that’s about the extent of presidential action in the past 1.5 years. Graffiti is going up all over the city equating President Ortega with past, despised dictators of Nicaragua.
Recently there was a nonviolent protest against what many people see as a growing dictatorship. Some crucial background info to the protest: In Nicaragua there are two main competing parties; the FSLN (“revolutionary” party lead by current President Daniel Ortega), and the PLC (more conservative party lead by corrupt and gluttonous former President Arnoldo Aleman). Aleman and Ortega got formed an alliance a few years back to help one another consolidate power, a move much despised by the Nicaragua public. As a result of that pact and of general party corruption, dissenters from the FSLN and the PLC tried to rise in the party ranks to change their party’s course, and were subsequently expelled by the party leaders. So, expelled dissenters from the FSLN formed a new party called the MRS (basically the “renovated” FSLN), and dissenters from the PLC formed a new party called the ALN. Many Nicaraguans were quite hopeful for the MRS and ALN, which represented an end to corruption and power hoarding by Ortega and Aleman.
Now to the protest. Elections for Mayor of Managua (an extremely powerful position) are coming up soon. The PLC and the ALN got back together after realizing they have no chance if they continue to split the conservative vote in the country. The MRS tried to run it’s own candidate against the powerhouse FSLN and PLC parties, but the Electoral Commission (under pressure from the Supreme Court, which in turn is controlled by the FSLN) refused to put the female MRS candidate on the ballot for some ridiculous reason regarding her filing process. So, about a month ago, she went on hunger strike, demanding to have her name on the ballot in November. MRS supporters staked out a major intersection for weeks across the street from the Electoral Commission, while their mayoral candidate lay in a hammock without eating. People held banners saying “No a la Dictadura” (no to the dictatorship- what many believe Nicaragua is heading toward with power consolidation and pushing opposition candidates off the ballot). A famous quote by the MRS founder and former presidential candidate (before dying suddenly of a heart attack) was displayed on a giant banner at the front of the crowd, reading “Yo naci en una dictadura, no quiero morir en otra” (I was born in a dictatorship, I don’t want to die in another). The protest grew in popularity over the weeks, it was all over the news, etc. Apparently things got a little violent with the protestors blocking the entire intersection and police beating them back with clubs. After a little under 3 weeks the MRS candidate had to be hospitalized and the hunger strike came to an end unsuccessfully. So, 4 years ago two dissident parties formed out of the mainstream FSLN and PLC parties, giving Nicaraguans hope for a future of a legitimate multiparty system. Yet due to random deaths, political pacts, and corruption, to date the FSLN and PLC parties remain the only ones on the ballot.

Projecto Generando Vida, Barrio El Recreo – the shovel incident, job changes: I recently decided that my afternoon class was too out of control and was causing me too much stress and exhaustion. I met with the director of the Project and we arranged to hire a Nicaraguan teacher to take over my 4th grade class in the afternoon. I will now serve as a tutor for 2 or 3 of the most troublesome or struggling students. This move was essential, I believe, to my health, to the quality of education for my students, and to allow me to put more energy into trying to salvage my morning class. I don’t really view it as an admission of failure, although I did initially. I think that it is being realistic and putting resources and talents where they can best flourish (a Nicaraguan is better at managing a class than I am, I am better working with small groups of students than with entire classes). It should be a good change for everyone, assuming that my replacement is not a flake. The change will start in three weeks; one more week of classes, two weeks of vacation, and the change will start with the commencing of the second semester in late July. Wholeheartedly accepting ones limits is not something that American culture really teaches, but it is something I’m learning here. Human beings can not, in fact, do anything if they just put their mind to it. But we can discover our talents and be content with those. I am not exceptionally talented at teaching a group of 15 violent, disturbed, vulgar, and cruel 4th graders (they have positive qualities too) to be peaceful and treat one another with respect while simultaneously teaching math and Spanish and English and sudoku. Maybe a Nicaraguan teacher is better at that, and I’m ok with that. I look forward to the opportunity to focus on 2 or 3 students in a setting that is not a class room.
In my morning class, I had to expel a student for the first time. Jonathan, a 14 year old who is about my size, but a lot bulkier, recently registered for my class. He has developmental issues and a serious problem with anger management and violent outbursts. He was quite calm for the first two weeks in my class, but the other day someone slapped him in the back of the head while I was out of the room, and I came back in after he had falsely accused a female student of mine and thrown juice all over her nice clothes. She, while screaming and crying, tried frantically to attack him, so I told him to sit down outside on a bench while I tried to restrain the girl. By the time the girl was sufficiently restrained, I looked over toward the library, where, about 30 feet away, Jonathan and another student of mine, a much smaller 10 year old were yelling at each other, the 10 year old likely harassing Jonathan for throwing juice on the girl. I decided to walk over and break that one up too. I got about half way to Jonathan, when he picked up a shovel. Trembling with anger and screaming at the 10 year old who was making fun of him, Jonathan raised the shovel over his head to swing, and the 10 year old kind of cowered and went silent. I probably paused for about 3 seconds, feeling as though my heart had stopped, and thinking out loud to myself “no way….”. Then I screamed at Jonathan like I’ve never screamed before and ran at him. He paused with the shovel still raised to swing and looked at me, I told him to give me the shovel, he responded with “he started it…”, so I grabbed the shovel away from him, and the ten year old ran away. I had my hand on Jonathan’s shoulder, half restraining him, while he trembled probably with anger and with fear of getting in trouble. All 14 of my students had formed a semi-circle around us to get a glimpse of the action. I was quite shaken and just stood there for a good 30 seconds before doing or saying anything. My supervisor was gone that day, so I just sent Jonathan home, telling him that, for the safety of the other students I would probably have to expel him. My supervisor and I talked with Jonathan the next day and expelled him from the Project…apparently not the first time he had been expelled for violent behavior. I think the rest of my students breathed a sigh of relief the next day when I told them he wouldn’t be returning…jeez.

Retreat!: On a happier note, about 4 times a year Jesuit Volunteer communities all over the world go on a 3 or 4 day retreat, and we just had our second of the year. We went about 4 hours to a secluded beach community in northwest Nicaragua and stayed at kind of a hippie ecolodge run by a gringo. The lodge was about a 60 second walk from the beach, and it was made up of little huts in a big grassy field. The place was great- composting toilets, very energy conscious, and provided a lot of cool projects for the local community. We kicked off retreat with 24 hours of silence, which was spent meditating, walking for hours on the beautiful beach, sitting in the surf, napping in hammocks, etc. The rest of the retreat was spent mostly in discussion (and playing on the beach) about the state of our community, how we feel like we are each living out the four JVI values (spirituality, community, simple living, social justice), and affirming one another’s gifts and strengths. It was very refreshing to escape from the city and just sit for hours being in awe of nature, and in the discussions I feel as though we made some serious headway on a lot of communication issues that have been plaguing community life. I think it’s safe to say now that I live for retreats!

So that’s the last month y pico in a nutshell. Thanks for reading. And just so you all know, Barack Obama has the official endorsement of the President of Nicaragua. Take it or leave it.

Peace,
Michael (aka Miguel/ Mycole/ Mateo/ Manuel/ Profesor Miguel/ Profe/ Pro/ Chele/ Gringo)


Jenna with some kids on our street (from left; Jassen, Jenna, Yahoska, Belkis)


El Recreo staff meeting, Mary's family present during their visit in May


Father Joe, a Jesuit priest and our in-country coordinator, speaking out against Guantanamo during a protest/vigil/stations of the cross during holy week


The protest/vigil/stations of the cross ended at the U.S. embassy in Managua


Gringo friends of ours in Managua hanging out at our house

Nicaragua in Peril

Tires aflame in the streets. Thick black smoke rising up all over the city. A country’s transportation system completely shut down. Protestors blocking off main highways, police responding with tear gas. This is El Paro de Transporte.

At least that’s what a Nicaraguan news station would say. Certainly true, but a little hyped up. Sadly but surely though, this country appears to be falling apart. Inflation and gas prices are out of control while wages remain stagnant here. Truckers that bring food into the cities from the country side, city to city bus companies, and bus cooperatives that operate Managua’s public transportation can no longer afford to do business because of Nicaragua’s crumbling economy. Almost all of them have gone on strike, demanding government subsidies for gasoline. Many bus drivers and their supporters are blocking off main highways throughout the country. Almost no busses are running in Nicaragua right now, not even in Managua. Nicaragua’s entire transportation system is essentially shutting down until the government gives it more money. This makes getting to work difficult (but not impossible), but unfortunately makes leaving the city impossible. The only way that bus companies can stay in business is to either charge more from passengers or get more money from the government, and most Nicaraguans can’t afford to pay anymore than they pay now for transportation. Apparently this is an ongoing problem…a few years ago bus cooperatives in Managua tried to raise their fares to cover the rising cost of gasoline, and citizens responded with massive protests, blocking traffic, and burning a number of city busses. I try to reserve blame as I know very little of the situation beyond rumors and news reports, but in my humble opinion it seems as though the citizens and bus cooperatives are both justifiably infuriated, while the government seems totally inept.

The transportation strike only added to a slew of other problems that are plaguing this country. I’m no macroeconomist, but it would appear as though the economy here is bordering free fall. Wages and employment are desperately low while food and utility prices are going through the roof. Speaking of utilities, our water at the house gets cut almost every evening now for about 3 hours, which is quite little compared to a lot of other neighborhoods in the city who only get water a couple hours a day. Electricity cuts are starting to be implemented as well. At work the power is going out at 2pm until at least 5pm every day. According to rumors, at best things will stay the same, but will most likely continue to get worse. The fact that purchasing food and having access to transportation, electricity, and water is getting consistently more difficult for Nicaraguans is a blatant sign to me that this country is in real trouble.

Work in El Recreo continues to have its ups and downs, with the downs going as low as to cause me to talk with my bosses about changing my work situation. It is just so draining and painful to be a teacher to these kids…I never imagined that such young human beings could do such awful things to one another and to their teacher. I feel like every class is a battle – I have to fight to keep them involved and listening and I have to fight even harder to keep the class only on the brink of total chaos without going over the edge. The emotional energy required to keep up the fight for an entire 2 hour class is far greater than that which I posses. Sometimes while my kids raise hell (literally, they bring on the reign of Satan) in the classroom I just sit at my desk, ignore them, and write haikus about my job. That’s when I just don’t care anymore. Other times, when I do care, I try to get things under control, which usually results in me yelling a lot. Anyway, I have a helper in the afternoon class now with whom I can send off my 3 or 4 worst kids to go work in a location other than my classroom. Hopefully that helps. There’s some really cute kids in El Recreo that just come to eat lunch at the Comedor, which tends to put a smile on my face before or after classes when I see them. It’s nice because I don’t have to see their misbehaving and cruel side that would come out in a classroom, and they’ll know me as the gringo who loves on them, not the gringo who yells at them. All in all, work is next to impossible and intentional community life is challenging, but I’m happy I’m here. Life in Managua, life in community, and life in El Recreo is quite fulfilling and invigorating and I am very thankful to feel like my everyday existence here is profound. Hope all who read this are well.

Thanks,
Michael

Reflections

“The gentlest thing in the world overcomes the hardest thing in the world. That which has no substance enters where there is no space. This shows the value of non-action. Teaching without words, performing without actions: That is the Master’s way.” –Tao Te Ching

I give up trying to be the amazing, inspirational teacher and mentor that comes into the ghetto and makes kids believe in themselves and gives them the tools they need to pull themselves out of their current situation. Because I consider myself a hopeful person, I will not say authoritatively that big change with my kids is impossible. Yet, for the sake of my sanity, I decided to no longer emotionally attach myself to the idea that I am going to make a clear and tangible difference in the lives of my students. I am not giving up hope, I am simply being realistic. One who comes into a Barrio like El Recreo expecting to take control and make things better will be overcome by the forces of poverty and violence and resolutely defeated. Expecting to change things will only lead to disappointment. So I welcome positive achievements in my classroom, but I don’t depend on them or demand them.
Instead of meeting the violence and hate and chaos of my kids with authoritarian style dominance, I am trying to take a kind of stance of nonviolence and nonaggression; my kids are the way they are, Barrio El Recreo is the way it is, and one gringo will not change the way it’s always been. I notice that when I am not aggressive and forceful with my students, they are less combative and violent. When I yell back at them they keep yelling, yet when I meet their yells with tranquility they calm down. Perhaps by not directly confronting the hate and violence which is so powerful and thrives on confrontation, I can slowly overcome it using alternative methods. Jesus talks about turning the other cheek, Martin Luther King talks about driving out hate with love, and Lao Tzu talks about using that which is soft, supple, and life giving to overcome that which is rigid and unmovable. Ideally I will be able to maintain an inner sense of tranquility while at work, and that tranquility and pacifistic approach to my students will slowly overcome the dark and powerful forces that they are accustomed to. The goal might not be to make highly motivated servants of peace out of my students, but at least to show them that the hate and violence that they think are so powerful can actually be overcome by more attractive and life giving forces. The more I adopt this attitude the better teacher I become.
In other news, my house community and I traveled to El Salvador at the end of March to participate in a procession commemorating the death of former Archbishop Oscar A. Romero in 1981. It was an adventure taking about 7 regular busses from Managua to San Salvador (11 hours) in an effort to make the most economically responsible trip possible. We were only in San Salvador for about 30 hours before coming home to work on Monday, but the experience was amazing. We spent some time at the UCA (University of Central America) where 6 Jesuit priests were assassinated in 1989 and where there is now a memorial to them and to Oscar Romero. On Saturday night we joined thousands of Salvadorans in a procession through the streets of San Salvador to the main Cathedral where Romero is buried to honor the sacrifice he made in the name of truth and social justice. Romero is a personal hero of all of ours and an inspiration to speak out against institutional violence and structural poverty, so it was quite special to participate with the people of his country in remembering his message.
The President of Nicaragua, Daniel Ortega (also the former President during the 1980s) made a special guest appearance in Barrio El Recreo a few weeks ago. The government here has been paving a few roads and giving some titles to houses in Barrio El Recreo recently, so Daniel came to the Barrio to give a speech about those things. It was kind of ridiculous…throughout the day there were Civil Defense people walking around Barrio El Recreo with huge guns and bullet proof vests arresting the drunks and homeless people who clearly posed a threat to the President’s security. The main road was blocked off and an elaborate stage and thousands of plastic chairs were set up…it felt more like a rock concert than a political speech. We didn’t stay for Ortega himself, since he always shows up about 4 hours late to scheduled political rallies, mainly to be fashionably late. We were tired, and no Nicaraguans were really that excited (apparently he is an excruciatingly boring speaker). As we were waiting at the bus stop though Ortega’s convoy passed right in front of us...a bunch of flashing lights, cops and Civil Defense, armored Range Rovers, etc. I think the hype was more exciting than anything he ended up saying that night (“God bless you all…, I promise to do…”, etc.).
Well those are most of my thoughts and summaries of exciting things that have happened in the last month. We went to the beach with a bunch of people from El Recreo recently, which was a blast, especially for Recreo residents who rarely get out. Anyway, I appreciate you reading this, and thanks for all the support in its various manifestations.

Peace,
Michael

Volcano

During Semana Santa (Holy Week) in Nicaragua most people go to the beach to refresh themselves in the overwhelming heat. To the confusion of many Nicaraguans who generally do not hike or climb mountains for fun, Josh (my housemate) and I decided to climb Volcan Momotombo during our spring vacation. Momotombo rises up about 5,000 feet, making it the third (?) highest volcano in the country (there are quite a few). It can be seen in the distance from many parts of Managua and has a very dominating and menacing aura surrounding it. But now this volcano has been dominated by the Jesuit Volunteers of Nicaragua. Below are pictures taken by Josh and I during our two-day trip to the top. Enjoy.



A view of Volcan Momotombo from Puerto Momotombo, three or four miles from the base. From here we hitch-hiked on a truck of farmers passing by, and then with an Italian man who happened to be a big shot in the Nicaraguan electricity business. He sweet talked the guards at the geothermic plant at the base of Momotombo (which we think he was in charge of) to let us in to climb the volcano. We then had to pay the guards for a 'guide' up the mountain (there was no actual guide).


We hiked from the geothermic plant at the base for about two hours until sunset where we set up camp, near the treeline. The wind picked up after sunset, and by midnight the poles of our tent had snapped in the wind. So we slept in a collapsed tent.


We packed up and left most of our stuff at 'base camp' and started hiking first thing in the morning before it got too hot. The sun came up right on the other side of the peak.


Making my way through the black sand, about an hour after we started hiking in the morning. Frequent stops were made to enjoy the view.


The views of northwestern Nicaragua were stunning...also note the ridiculous incline of the side of the volcano.


Josh contemplating strategy as we slowly approach the top. About 1 hour from the top.


This is what Josh was looking at in the previous picture.


Josh resting. The ground on which we were climbing was very steep and made up of loose rock and sand, making the hike very difficult and slippery. The wind was also out of control.


We took a long rest at what appeared to be the last solid rock for a while that we could stop at. I was mildly concerned for our safety past this point with the wind and steep drop off to the right. From this point on we were scrambling on all fours.



Josh and I at the 'last' resting point. About a half hour from the top.


The crater of the volcano at the top.


Me, exhausted at the crater, and fearful of slipping and sliding down the volcano.


Back home, dirty and tired. We had hitch-hiked from the Volcano all the way to a town about an hour out of Managua and then took a bus back in. Given the amazing success we had with hitch-hiking, timing the busses just right, and not getting lost or injured or too tired to climb, Josh and I firmly believe that the entire universe conspired to help us achieve our goal of dominating Volcan Momotombo.